The Psychological Downside of the Like Button: Why We Need to Rethink Social Media Interactions

Social media platforms have become an integral part of our lives, connecting us with friends, family, celebrities, and strangers across the globe. We use them to share our thoughts, feelings, opinions, and experiences, as well as to consume information, entertainment, and inspiration. But how do these platforms affect our mental health and well-being? And what role does the ubiquitous like button play in shaping our online behavior and self-esteem?

The like button is a simple feature that allows users to express their approval or appreciation of a post or comment with a single click or tap. It was first introduced by Facebook in 2009 and has since been adopted by other platforms such as Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, and TikTok. The like button is designed to provide feedback, engagement, and social validation to the content creators and to encourage more activity and interaction among the users.

However, the like button also has some negative psychological consequences that we need to be aware of and address. Here are some of the main drawbacks of the like button and why we need to rethink how we use social media interactions.

1. The like button creates a feedback loop of dopamine and addiction. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that regulates reward, motivation, and pleasure in the brain. When we receive a like on our post or comment, we experience a small burst of dopamine that makes us feel good and reinforces our behavior. This creates a feedback loop that motivates us to seek more likes and post more frequently. However, this also leads to addiction and dependence on external validation. We become obsessed with checking our notifications, counting our likes, and comparing ourselves with others. We also experience withdrawal symptoms when we don't receive enough likes or when we are away from our devices.

2. The like button reduces the quality and diversity of our online communication. The like button is a simplistic and superficial way of expressing our reactions to online content. It does not capture the nuances, emotions, and complexities of human communication. It also discourages us from engaging in more meaningful and thoughtful interactions such as commenting, sharing, or having a conversation. Moreover, the like button creates a filter bubble and an echo chamber that limit our exposure to different perspectives and opinions. We tend to like posts that confirm our existing beliefs and preferences and ignore or avoid posts that challenge or contradict them. This reduces our critical thinking skills and our ability to empathize with others.

3. The like button affects our self-esteem and mental health. The like button can have a significant impact on how we perceive ourselves and our worth. We tend to base our self-esteem on the number of likes we receive and the social comparison we make with others. We feel happy and confident when we receive many likes and unhappy and insecure when we receive few or none. We also feel anxious and stressed about posting something that will generate enough likes and avoid posting something that might be unpopular or controversial. This can lead to low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, loneliness, and social isolation.

How can we overcome the psychological downside of the like button?

The like button is not inherently bad or evil. It can be a useful tool for providing feedback, engagement, and social validation when used appropriately and moderately. However, we need to be mindful of its potential negative effects on our psychology and behavior and take steps to prevent or reduce them. At Tulkee, I completely removed the "like button" and directed people to a one-on-one chat if they liked something very much. Alternatively, they can bookmark a post they like and this could be considered an implicit endorsement of the user.

What do you think about the "bookmark button" and building a closer relationship with the person?